Ramblings and a collection of memories from a young woman trying to make a living at home. Entrepreneur & stay at home mother of a special needs child with Schizencephaly. My goal is to spread awareness of this extremely rare developmental birth defect and help out my little monster day by day. I currently reside in South Florida. I have nothing but pure intentions. I create and sell hair accessories and all things cute. Please check out my All proceeds go directly to my son Skylar. Bianca xoTumblr (3.0; @lovewhatsmissing)http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/341eefde9bd0b1d856f76ea4d96f9a7c/tumblr_momafchFRH1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Today I opened my eyes as you stood before me, half my height. Feels like only weeks have passed since I seen your beautiful face for the very first time. I would hold you in my arms singing all my loving while you’d sleep soundly. I embraced you while you cried, were fussy, happy, and just because. Never would I have imagined that this little bundle in my arms would have changed my life so radically, so unexpectedly those first few months. Soon the excruciating seizures came, those deplorable seconds turned my world upside down and shook me to my core.</p> <p>I would hold you. I would hold you gently in my arms and count, while you cried out in between. I held you against my chest and pleaded with God when I looked down upon you. When those seconds felt hours, I would hold you and fight back tears that would burst profusely from my eyes.</p> <p>The following months have been recovery. Countless hours of agonizing shrieks, blows to my body, sleepless nights, and despairing thoughts plagued my mind. I would watch with sorrowful eyes as you’d struggle to drag your body across the ground using only one arm. I would watch you grow angry and tired with your limbs not functioning the way you’d want them to. I held you in my arms and cried. Cried for all the things I wished would disappear, cried for all the things you couldn’t do. </p> <p>I pushed, compelled to see your light. To see you conquer all that was given to you. To see you smile as you stood for the first time, legs shaking. To see you take those not so graceful first steps, but overcome with joy as you’d fall onto your knees. Only to get up and run towards me to be embraced once more. To see the hand that was only there, to strike keys on a piano, to strum a guitar and serenade me with it’s beautiful sound. To see you laugh until you’ve ran out of breath, to giggle on anyways. To hear your voice, that was buried deep within your chest. Your voice that made my whole world suspend into silence to hear you speak. To hear I love you from your small lips that filled my eager ears, and completed my soul. To see that smile, teeth gleaming with pride once you’ve accomplished something you’ve done a thousand times, or have just learned. </p> <p>To see you grow into this magnificent man, radiating with passion in all your glory. A man that has changed every aspect of my being. Who has taught me true humility, the ever loving feeling of carrying a child and being a mother. Who taught me the sun always shines after the worst of storms.</p> <p>I will always love you. Fearlessly, endlessly, and forever.</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/53324467147http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/53324467147Tue, 18 Jun 2013 21:53:14 -0400I love youschizencephalylovewhatsmissingspecial needsmotherhoodEpilepsyseizureseizureschildrenfamilylovewest syndromecerebral palsycpparentingtoddlerboymothermother's love<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/c27952c2fd2b273d95de3b1bd6badd5a/tumblr_mob429rWIO1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/e1b65c142a19f4ee898ce625d68e10ef/tumblr_mob429rWIO1qi6prxo2_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/9a5271299d0cc9b0652ec11a62040540/tumblr_mob429rWIO1qi6prxo3_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><p>Last weekend. The sun finally decided to come out and we went outside to play. Skylar is always laughing and smiling around him and I can’t even handle it. </p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/52830686887http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/52830686887Wed, 12 Jun 2013 20:58:57 -0400content<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/641c37a2f342a2cc2e8b8c490a01e434/tumblr_moayl1whDO1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/4c54ed19605f00de29acd12c6672a9b2/tumblr_moayl1whDO1qi6prxo2_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/0ef14a5ea7dcf7c73b6cff82e699beb0/tumblr_moayl1whDO1qi6prxo3_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/522de979e3bc807f6d4200768ced838e/tumblr_moayl1whDO1qi6prxo4_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><p>New turban headbands available now in the <a href="http://lovewhatsmissing.storenvy.com" target="_blank">shop</a>.</p> <p>Bianca xo</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/52823311662http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/52823311662Wed, 12 Jun 2013 19:09:32 -0400turbanturbandhead bandhair accessoriesfloralhairlong hairhairstyleheadlovewhatsmissingbowgirlgoldmetallicleopardanimal printleopard headbandfloral headbandfloral head<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/4b06825bd5b220292229ea45ee08d933/tumblr_moapovoefn1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Another bow sale! BUY 2 GET 1 FREE. <a href="http://lovewhatsmissing.storenvy.com/products/357513-studded-bows-buy-2-get-1-free" target="_blank">Shop here</a></p> <p>Please leave color selection for your free bow in comment section while checking out. Happy shopping xo</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/52809633424http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/52809633424Wed, 12 Jun 2013 15:48:32 -0400bowhair bowstudstudsstud bowsatin bowhair acessorieslovewhatsmissingprincesspink bowlarge bowoversized bow<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/ee7c310caea83ad2a3efddef69c35b77/tumblr_mnu85idxkz1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Everything is falling into place.</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/52088735156http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/52088735156Mon, 03 Jun 2013 18:14:32 -0400feeling good<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/f23c773ac5ef997c23d7c0fe5f1a888e/tumblr_mnkvz1mjc81qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>New headbands coming very soon! If you follow my <a href="https://www.facebook.com/lovewhatsmissing" target="_blank">facebook page</a> you’ll get updates on when they are available for sale ;)</p> <p>Bianca xo</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/51670307429http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/51670307429Wed, 29 May 2013 17:38:50 -0400love what's missingheadbandturbanturbandsfloralleopardfeathersbohovintagefashionlace<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/8e6b7cb348f78c0cd5b2b84b0fd60478/tumblr_mn3s1cz6zC1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/ba65f33178e742f47d78f2f599dc020d/tumblr_mn3s1cz6zC1qi6prxo2_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><p>Never in this life would I have ever thought to come across this feeling. Weightlessness, contentment, and pure joy.</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/51590712954http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/51590712954Tue, 28 May 2013 18:14:39 -0400Things are looking up<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/0db3c6b8d5f36469edad5aa56a2c6979/tumblr_mmayp708TG1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>BUY 2 GET 1 FREE on all neutral bow headbands. Just leave the color choice of you free headband in comment section while checking out. Offer ends 5/10. <a href="http://lovewhatsmissing.storenvy.com/products/1261125-neutral-bow-headband-buy-2-get-1-free" target="_blank">SHOP HERE</a>. </p> <p>xo</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/49642621152http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/49642621152Sat, 04 May 2013 21:55:55 -0400bowheadbandturbanturbandhairhairbandhair scarfcuteacessoriesbohohairbow<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/5f56d88919e2fdc5e4099e5d3f4386a4/tumblr_mm5adnifgC1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Sorted through all my fabric today and decided to make a dress. Had no pattern so I just winged it. Incredibly happy with the results. </p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/49398690278http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/49398690278Wed, 01 May 2013 20:22:00 -0400floraldressdown to 116 pounds fuck yes<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/051c09d1100a2b96cdbec87876f341b4/tumblr_ml9a2obHgq1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><span>Within a few months you have gone from saying a few words and syllables to almost 70, and making 2-3 word sentences. You have gone from taking not so grateful steps, to running and jumping and dancing. Now picking out your own clothes and p</span><span class="text_exposed_show">utting them on almost by yourself, crawling into your own bed and putting yourself to sleep. Sitting on the potty and telling me all different kinds of stories of the ones you love and miss. Eating by yourself and feeding me your saliva covered food because you’re so damn sweet. Putting your shoes and AFO on to go on our adventures, and taking them off when we get home. Running to all the other kids to play with them. Thanking me for all I provide you with words, kisses and hugs. You have grown so incredibly fast from just a baby to a little man. You know no fears. Know not of your limitations, but only your strengths and I find it so admirable. Here’s to you, the most amazing man I will have ever come to know.</span></p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/47967066358http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/47967066358Sun, 14 Apr 2013 13:32:48 -0400schizencephalyspecial needslove you skylar.<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/9daf83315fce867a4e49162e002c7021/tumblr_mjlxcoMYb71qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>The sold out stud hair bows are now back up for sale and with two new colors, red and royal blue. These sold out fast last time so get them quick! <a href="http://lovewhatsmissing.storenvy.com/products/357513-studded-bows" target="_blank">Bows here.</a></p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/45272708546http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/45272708546Wed, 13 Mar 2013 12:19:36 -0400bowhair bowhairstud bowstuds<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/3ca64dc0159744cac2e18aa72591a32f/tumblr_mi69zwGDot1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>I don’t update my facebook page enough, so I’m doing a giveaway as a promotion with some of my favorite floral pieces! I’m going to keep this as simple as possible.</p> <p><strong>How to enter:</strong></p> <p><strong><span>Like my facebook page for <a href="https://www.facebook.com/lovewhatsmissing" target="_blank">Love What’s Missing</a>. As soon as my page reaches 500 likes I will put all your names in a hat and pull one out at random.The winner will receive: one floral striped clutch, calico print turband, rose print hairband, tea time coffee sleeve and 2 pairs of rose post earrings. </span><span> </span></strong></p> <p>US RESIDENTS ONLY (sorry guys, next time!) Once the winner is chosen he/she will be announced on my facebook page and will have 2 weeks to respond with their contact information to receive their prize. If the winner does not respond I will draw again.</p> <p>Reblog, & Good luck! xo</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/43015039878http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/43015039878Wed, 13 Feb 2013 13:58:20 -0500giveawaycontestfloralturbandheadbandsclutchlovewhatsmissing<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/ec8e9ec825589ce6c201c1fd1806b195/tumblr_mi4vhwmOiU1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><span> </span></p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/42962237882http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/42962237882Tue, 12 Feb 2013 19:48:26 -0500turbanturbandfloral turbanspikestudstud turbandhairheadbandlovewhatsmissing<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/fe4ff974212595bcdadf3f6846cc236d/tumblr_mhgc0wrqG01qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Someone I love relies on me in ways you will never understand. Someone I love endures pain and challenges that break my heart and renew my spirit at the same time. Someone I love is unable to advocate for themselves for things that most of us take for granted. <span>Someone I love will never have the opportunities that every child should have. Someone I love will need unconditional love and support after I am gone - this frightens me to the core. Someone I love encounters pity, stereotyping responses, and prejudice at every turn, because they look, act, and/or learn differently than others. Someone I love has needs that require me to allow “outsiders” to have power and input in areas that should be mine alone to meet. Someone I love will continue to look to me for everything in life long after other children are able to assume a place as part of the world. Someone I love has needs that require more time and energy than I have to give. Someone I love has needs that mean I am not able to meet basic needs of my own. Someone I love has needs that have become the driving force behind major decisions my family makes. Someone I love has changed me in ways I will never be able to describe.</span></p> <p>Someone I love has taught me about love, and the really important things in life.</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/41878080118http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/41878080118Wed, 30 Jan 2013 13:44:28 -0500special needsschiznecephalyauthor unknown<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/33cc2df56c31289aa402953cb6e497fd/tumblr_mgu18v0LIn1qi6prxo5_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/6f1f7451d14cd98092826b7deeb42f20/tumblr_mgu18v0LIn1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/8e44d78ddb5c5c81b4d7a1679793edbe/tumblr_mgu18v0LIn1qi6prxo4_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/7649294a84d5f37cd7775b90fc56b97d/tumblr_mgu18v0LIn1qi6prxo3_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/efffc65c00363440a8ac420e382bea22/tumblr_mgu18v0LIn1qi6prxo2_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><p>It amazes me how much you’ve grown the past few months. Your walking is improving so incredibly you’re almost running now. You’re talking more and articulating your words, eating independently, and hopefully we’ll start <em>really</em> potty training soon. Love you little man, I am so proud. </p> <p>xo </p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/40852210873http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/40852210873Fri, 18 Jan 2013 12:47:00 -0500<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/1670d182b381a464cfc47f1487d5919c/tumblr_mgldvuXnjI1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Bow Headbands, in a large array of colors available in <a href="http://lovewhatsmissing.storenvy.com/products/928838-bow-headband" target="_blank">my store</a>.</p> <p>xo</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/40480580105http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/40480580105Sun, 13 Jan 2013 20:38:40 -0500bowheadbandhairlovewhatsmissingpinktiffany blueminthair how<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/018afe74d43d78d94d801464778fe70b/tumblr_mfwpgiPal51qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Having a bow lot sale in my store! Discounted bows + a flat rate shipping price for the set. No extra fees, plus a sale. There’s only 8 lots, first come first serve. Happy shopping xo</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/39317198751http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/39317198751Mon, 31 Dec 2012 12:49:26 -0500bowhair bowfloralhair<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/01a01b83f9fd4904dfe585b97096147d/tumblr_mfpgseVrj11qi6prxo6_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/0ec4b120b9152e140289ca308f1aa8f5/tumblr_mfpgseVrj11qi6prxo4_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/505b9496e287d31e4b43bc7a3df8efe4/tumblr_mfpgseVrj11qi6prxo5_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/9927a537fa27b62902543063a17c6e60/tumblr_mfpgseVrj11qi6prxo2_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/367d0542406114a4a4fa9f19e882bcbd/tumblr_mfpgseVrj11qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/1b67d9b8c55c2fe0ea8735c7c5baea29/tumblr_mfpgseVrj11qi6prxo3_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><p>Our best Christmas yet. You finally got a tablet for therapy, lots and lots of toys, books, a new piano, a convertible, a giant bear, shark and wolf. Here’s to our most successful Christmas, another 5 years for your daddy and I, and a wonderful New Year of experiences and love together. Cannot wait to see what 2013 has waiting for you my dear.</p> <p>xo</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/38971867970http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/38971867970Thu, 27 Dec 2012 15:00:32 -0500christmasspecial needsschizencephaly<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/8c6b60d33dcd76ff6c01405d4100d5c3/tumblr_mevu384MFp1qi6prxo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>This month has been so incredibly crazy and super busy and I’m working on some new stuff again, wrapping presents, cleaning, entertaining Sky all at the same time. Busiest December I’ve ever had. Here’s a little sneak peek at some new infinity scarves. Which ones your favorite?</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/37729459693http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/37729459693Tue, 11 Dec 2012 14:57:35 -0500floralstripesscarfinfinity scarf<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mekp9jFPKG1qi6prxo1_r2_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>The big bow turban headband now in <a href="http://lovewhatsmissing.storenvy.com/" target="_blank">my store</a>! Perfect for Christmas, and will be available in a few new colors next week ;)</p>http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/37275757852http://www.lovewhatsmissing.com/post/37275757852Wed, 05 Dec 2012 15:02:00 -0500bowturbandheadbandbow headbandredchristmashairbows